Does My Morning Routine Need a Multi Vitamin?: Ritual Vitamin Review*

I’m a big believer in a daily routine. Whether you’re working from home right now or just trying to survive with your kids, having a routine is great way to feel like your best self. I find that scheduling times to do certain things helps me do them—and reminding myself of my goals, and my daily tasks to meet those goals, is a great way to stay motivated and on task.

One of my big goals for 2020 was actually related to my health; I’ve always struggled with my body and body image, and I’ll be the first to tell you that I’m often too tired to make dinner at the end of the day. Doing so requires me to keep a routine: I meal prep, I plan time to cook, and I make it happen. Stay-at-home orders, however, really threw a wrench in that routine.

It’s required a lot of work for me to put how my body feels first. I try not to think about calories anymore—but rather, what is going to support my health at this point in my life? What is going to make me feel good? And when I talk about feeling good, what does that mean for me?

When it comes to my daily routine, I try to hit a few specific points:

• Feeling accomplished. I know there has been a lot of discourse recently about “you don’t have to be productive right now”. I totally get that. But that’s also not for me. I’m still working and unfortunately, my job is all about production. For me, to feel good about my day, I have to feel like I accomplished something.

• Supporting my health (and my body). For me, this means taking a soothing bath in the evening, eating foods that make me feel my best, and taking a multivitamin that I love. (More about this in a minute!)

• Keeps me motivated. Having a clean home motivates me—that means, every day I have to make time to clean the parts of my home that need it. Typically, this means cleaning every sink and toilet in the house, and vacuuming the floors.

Why I Added a Multi Vitamin to my Routine

I’ve taken vitamins and supplements most of my life. When I was in elementary, I stopped eating dairy for a long time—and I remember my mom making me take those chewy calcium supplements every day. That was my first introduction to using a supplement to support my health and fill in the gaps.

Previously, I’ve always used gummy vitamins in my routine. When I was pregnant with Forrest, I relied on gummy vitamins to get me everything I needed—but I also knew they didn’t have enough calcium for me! (Can you tell calcium has always been an issue for me?)

I recently started using Ritual vitamins** in my daily routine. Every day, I keep them by my coffee maker so I can take one when I drink my coffee and eat breakfast. I take a second vitamin with lunch usually. I’ve always broken up when I take vitamins, especially if I need to take two, because I found this helped my stomach not get upset. (I have a very sensitive stomach, so this is just for me! Most people can probably just take 2 at once!)

The reason I took the leap and went with Ritual vitamins, instead of my usual gummies, is because I was looking for something that would support my diet a little more. When I bought gummy vitamins in the store, I often felt unsure of what I was getting. How was this going to help me?

The great thing about Ritual is that they tell you exactly why they include everything they do. Here’s what they have to say:

Essential for Women contains essential nutrients, each in their absorptive, vegan certified, non- GMO, gluten-free, and dairy-free forms. These nutrients fill the gaps in women’s diets to build a healthy foundation for the future, supporting the brain with Omega-3s, blood and heart health with Iron, and bones with Vitamin K.

One thing I specifically liked was that the Essential for Women vitamin (what I’m taking!) is designed to support the absorption of calcium. When I was pregnant with Forrest, I didn’t get enough calcium and one of my molars rotated. I know, that sounds terrifying. I feel you! I ended up getting an abscess and needed a root canal that took up the better part of a year. I took calcium supplements when I was pregnant, alongside those gummy prenatal vitamins—and I realize now that I probably wasn’t taking the right combination of things to actually support my body absorbing those vitamins!

I also like that Ritual vitamins are dairy-free and vegan; not eating dairy is a huge step I made for my health and while I’ve gone back and forth on it, I definitely feel better when I don’t eat dairy.

How Do I Like Them?

The thing I love most about Ritual vitamins**, to me, was that they are easy to swallow, they didn’t upset my stomach (multiple bonus points there!), and they don’t have that powdery, weird vitamin smell. They smell minty and fresh and amazing. Plus, they’re really pretty—their packaging is just plain cute!

When it comes to how they worked for me, I think it’s hard to say definitively—but I do feel like in the last month, I’ve been feeling a lot better about everything. I think part of that is my mindset: you can make a situation better in lots of ways, and developing a routine that works for me, and really drilling into my work, has helped a lot. But having Ritual vitamins** as part of my routine was a big help too.

There is also something very comforting to me about doing the same things for myself every day: I clean my bathroom sink, I make a cup of coffee, and then I take my Ritual vitamins. And that feels really good.

Are Ritual Vitamins for You?

Do you want to try Ritual vitamins** too? They have 3 varieties:

• Essentials for Women

• Prenatal (I really want to hear more about these!)

• Essential for Women 50+

Visit Ritual’s website to learn more about each variety and what they offer.

If you’re looking to make a multivitamin part of your routine, here’s a few tips:

• Keep your multivitamin where you’ll remember them. When I hide my vitamins in my medicine cabinet, I’m more likely to forget about them. I set a reminder in my phone and add it to my to do list—and I keep my vitamins by my coffee maker, like I said, so I see them every morning.

• Find a routine that works for you. I split up my vitamins, just to make sure I don’t end up getting sick to my stomach (like I said, this is mostly a me issue—sometimes drinking too much water too fast makes me sick to my stomach!). But find something that works for you: maybe taking your vitamins at night or setting an alarm.

• Set a goal related to your vitamins. Maybe you want to make sure you take them 5 days a week at least or you want to take vitamins for a year—just to see if it makes a difference. Set a goal, divide it into daily-weekly-monthly tasks (in this case, taking them every day!) and go for it!

If you would like to try Ritual vitamins, click the button below to order a bottle today! I think you’re going to love them. Let me know how you incorporate them into your routine and what you think.

A Day in the Life of a Freelance Marketing Copywriter During Stay-At-Home Orders

One thing that has brought me a lot of comfort lately has been reading other people’s daily schedules and lives right now. I started thinking of how I could contribute to the conversation; I work a non-essential job from home with a 4-year-old every single day. The last 6 weeks have been stressful and difficult; there has been so many decisions, so much to do.

But I feel like for others in similar positions to me (working from home, trying to care for children, trying to look forward without stress), it’s really helpful to see how others are handling it. How are we scheduling our time? How are we making things work?

This has felt like the most surreal 2 months of my life; I started a new freelance contract in late February and then, stay-at-home orders happened in Oregon. Everything has changed for that particular client and the work I’m doing!

I guess the main reason why I wrote this was to show you: what I do all day; how I’m helping Forrest adjust to this very weird, very isolated time; and to let you know that if you need help troubleshooting your day (or just need to talk!), I’m here.

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Morning

I wake up at 5am to tackle some scheduling for a client. I live in a rural area, so I basically have 2 forms of internet: unlimited data from 2am-8am, then 15 gb of data for the month the rest of the day. For big data tasks like a lot of uploading, I try to get up early to get those done. 

As I get my computer booted up, I make coffee for my husband. Then, I make an iced coffee from the leftover coffee I keep in the fridge for myself. (I use 1 cup of cold coffee, 3 tablespoons of oat milk, 1.5 tablespoons of almond milk creamer, and 1 packet of truvia, plus ice cubes. If you’re looking for a good, strong iced coffee recipe.)

Scheduling takes a few hours that I usually have to split up over a few days—but in about an hour and a half, I manage to get a big chunk done for all clients. By 7:30, my husband is up and getting ready to leave. He’s a teacher and while he’s not teaching students in person, due to our internet situation, he is still working from his classroom. This is nice because it gives us both a chance to get away from each other and have some room to breathe.

My son usually wakes up between 7:30 and 8. Once he’s up, I help him pick out clothes, get dressed, and comb his hair. Then I make breakfast. Today, I make him oatmeal, which is his new favorite. He has strawberries and raspberries on the side.

Once he’s eaten, I take him to my mom’s by 8:30; she watches him for me while I work for a few hours. For the first 5 weeks of stay-at-home orders, we quarantined away from my parents; my mom asked to start watching Forrest again and I couldn’t say no. It’s been a huge stress reliever for me and F’s behavior and mood has improved as well. He hadn’t been out of the house for 5 weeks and I don’t take him if I need to run errands.

At home, I take a shower, eat breakfast myself, and then jump into work for a client. I manage a Facebook community for a national brand via a local agency. I use time blocking to manage my day, so I dedicate 1-2 hours in the morning to this client. Then, I take a quick break to work out and clean up my bedroom; I make the bed, start my diffuser going so it smells good, and start any laundry. I also move the morning’s coffee from the coffee pot to my iced coffee container in the fridge. 

Then, I spend an hour writing and I answer emails in all my various company emails. 

By this time, it’s 11:30. I let my dog outside, make a second iced coffee, and then head back to my office to tackle an hour of client work, including writing.

Originally I was supposed to have client calls from 12:30-2, but they were canceled and moved to tomorrow, so I head to my mom’s to pick up Forrest. On Monday, we get McDonald’s as a treat; Forrest gets a Happy Meal and I get a large Diet Coke. At home, we have some TV time and I check my client’s Instagram accounts at the same time.

After about an hour, I return to my office and do a second round of community management for one of my client’s—this usually takes anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour. Today it takes about an hour. I answer any emails or Slack messages from this client. I have so enjoyed the work I do in community management; right now, I’m a temp employee while their usual social media coordinator is on maternity leave. I’m so excited to see her return, but I’ll be sad to leave this work behind. (As an update: when I wrote this, I was planning to be done in mid-May with them, but I’ll actually be staying on to continue to do their scheduling and weekend community management! I’m very excited as I love this team.)

Once I get that done, I do some admin tasks for myself, primarily related to getting Forrest registered for preschool next year and accounting.

Admin work done, it’s almost 4pm. F is pretty good and doesn’t interrupt me a ton when I work; it helps that my office is separate and we’ve taught him that he doesn’t just walk into it (although I do catch him stealing paper from my printer fairly frequently). I turn off my computer and head to the kitchen. 

We are having leftover chili from the weekend, so F helps me make a new batch of cornbread. Then, I get him a snack to eat until dinner is ready and/or my husband gets home. (It’s a tube of yogurt, his favorite thing.) 

The TV goes off after 4pm, so we listen to an episode of Storytime, a story podcast for kids, or music. Each week we pick a new music artist and I make a kid-friendly playlist for Forrest. (I won’t take credit for this idea—it’s inspired by Elsie Larson of a Beautiful Mess!) This week is Leonard Cohen, which is a bit heavy for a 4-year-old. He much preferred Beatles week or Shania Twain week. 

I usually pour myself a glass of wine during this; I have a Winc wine membership and I have enjoyed every single wine I’ve gotten from them. (Here is my referral link if anyone wants to try Winc!)

Close to 5, my husband gets home, washes his hands, and changes his clothes. I serve up dinner and we eat together as a family. Forrest helps us clean up afterward, then he heads to his room to play. My husband usually relaxes in his office upstairs during this time; it’s right next to Forrest’s room, so he gets to wrangle while I work uninterrupted for a while. 

I finish up a blog post for my website, then double-check my to do list. I’ve pretty much gotten my work handled for the day, so I work on some writing. I’m currently planning my NaNoWriMo novel for November—it’s just something to do! 

When I hit a stopping point during writing, I head upstairs to take a bath. Forrest is happily playing with my husband, so I light a candle, run a bath, and download a new book on my library app on my phone to read. I probably read 3-4 books a week, sometimes more. I wish I could tell you I was reading highbrow works of literature. The truth is, I’ve been reading through Lisa Kleypas’s library of Regency-era romances and have moved on to some of her contemporaries. I have an entire tag full of these books on my library app.

After my bath, I clean up the bathroom and do my skincare routine. It’s nearly 8pm by this time, so Forrest gets ready for bed (brushes his teeth, washes his face, puts on his pajamas). He’s been having trouble sleeping for a while, ever since we moved into our new house, and surprise, things were getting a lot better in February. Just in time for stay-at-home orders!

He watches Lego Movie 2 in bed beside me while I play Animal Crossing. He usually falls asleep during this and we move him to his bedroom. Sometimes, he stays there. Most days, I wake up around midnight to him asleep on the floor next to me in what we call his “nest”. I don’t particularly mind this. 

Before I fall asleep, I check my email, Slack, and social media apps one last time, just to make sure I didn’t miss something urgent. I make a few notes on my phone of things to remember the next day, then turn on my heating pad. 

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That’s my day! That’s a pretty standard day for us, broken up occasionally by meetings. I’d love to see what your day is like! Let me know in the comments or link your own blog post.

How I'm Transforming My Dry, Tired Skin

Do you ever say or write or think a small brag (not intentionally!) and then immediately have it bite you in the ass?

On one of the last beauty posts I wrote, I said something along the lines of, “Despite my acne, I’m really lucky to have oily skin; my skin isn’t dry and therefore, I’m naturally protected from typical aging.”

Friends, I played myself. The moment I said it, I think my skin heard it, learned about it, absorbed it from my brain… and decided to rapidly turn around and do the opposite thing. For the last 3 months, I have noticed my skin really struggling. I break out, then my skin gets dry, then I look ancient and tired. I’ve always struggled with redness and being kind of ruddy, but lately, it’s been dialed up another notch.

My skin has been flaky at times and generally just tired looking. Dull.

As you can imagine, I was not happy about this transformation. My skin routine is aimed around being oily and while I use oil in my routine, it wasn’t the focus of my routine. So right as the COVID 19 pandemic started to take off, I was struggling with my skin.

Then, of course, being home, not sticking to my skincare routine as much, and being stressed as hell made it worse. Two weeks ago, I looked in the mirror and thought, who is this person??

The need to transform was strong, but I knew I wasn’t going to have my tools I usually do. No going to Sephora or Ulta and asking a million questions, consulting both sales associates and Google on my phone. No samples. No trial and error. I had to work with what I had available and what I got in my Ipsy.

Even in the past 2 weeks, I’ve seen a huge improvement in my skin. If you have dry, slightly dull skin, here are a few suggestions (and general methods) to see an improvement in the next few weeks.

1. Drink More Water.

I normally hate when blogs give this piece of advice. We get it! Water! We don’t drink enough water!

Personally, based on what I’ve read, I think a lot of people drink too much water. If you’re peeing constantly, you’re drinking too much water—sorry not sorry! Your body is peeing out the excess! Stop! That being said: for the first 10 days of stay-at-home and quarantine orders, I realized that I hadn’t even thought about drinking water for a while. I drank 0 water. No water. I drank coffee and that was it. No wonder I felt like crap???

So, yes, sorry: drink some water. Really. Drink water when you’re thirsty and with meals. You don’t need to pound 100+ ounces of water a day, I promise, but like… have a sip. Maybe 2 or 3, honestly.

2. Use Up the Serum in Your Sheet Masks.

I have a collection of great sheet masks that I’ve acquired from TJ Maxx and other various stores. If you are doing the same, now is the time to use those babies up! However, my tip for sheet masks is always this: don’t throw away the serum! Once I do a sheet mask, I dope the extra serum into a small tuperware I keep in my bathroom and then use that serum in my routine. Most often, sheet masks have hyaluronic acid in them, which helps absorb moisture; this is a really economical way to keep hyaluronic acid in your routine day-to-day. It’ll help plump your skin and make sure your moisturizer is absorbing as much as it can.

3. Use an AHA Face Wash and/or Peel.

AHA stands for “alpha hydroxy acid,” a series of naturally occurring acids that can do a lot to improve your skin. When I talk about using a chemical exfoliant in your routine, often what I mean is a mix of AHA and BHA acids. If you have dry skin, though, AHAs, are the best for you; AHAs have molecules that love water and help improve the skins moisture content.

Right now, I’m using the Murad AHA/BHA Exfoliating cleanser every other day (usually when i take a shower!); I’ve reviewed it previously here. This product is exfoliating, but because it also contains AHA, it’s great for dry, tired looking skin. I’ve also been using the AHA! Peel so Good Skin Renewal Gel (that I reviewed here) once a week to help with texture on and below my jawline and flaky skin.

4. Pick the Right Toner.

Toner is a tough one. For a long time, I was kind of under the assumption that toner was a scam. A fancy water I splash on my face? PLEASE.

But now I know that toners contain those all important chemical exfoliants. Right now, I’m using the PureHeals Softening Toner (which I got a deluxe sample of for $3 from Ipsy); this is a moisturizing toner that contains lactic acid and niacinamide, both of which are great if you have acne. It also has oils in it to help with moisture. In short: it’s a great option for me right now! I also have had good luck with the Pixie Glow Tonic, but that seemed a little drying for me right now.

5. Use a Moisturizing Face Wash in the Morning.

I got the TonyMoly Moisture Burst Gel to Water Morning Cleansing cleanser in my Ipsy bag. I generally like TonyMoly’s products: they’re good, but sometimes they can be middle-of-the-road, so I never actually seek them out to buy. I’m glad I added this one to my Ipsy bag though (for $3!); it’s a great, gentle morning cleanser.

I used to never wash my face in the morning, aside from a swipe with water. My logic was that I washed my face the night before and how dirty could my face be again? I’ve realized since then, of course, that my skin needs a blank slate in the morning, plus I spend all night sweating with my hair on my face. I probably just need to wash my face.

Adding this cleanser has been a huge help; morning is often when my skin feels the roughest and driest and if I’m not planning to take a shower, I feel pretty grimy all day. I like this cleanser because it’s really gentle and very moisturizing. However, the cleanser you choose is entirely up to you!

6. Mix Up Your Moisturizer.

I rotate between 3 moisturizers for the day and at night:

• H2O+ Oasis Hydrating Treatment (here is an older version that’s still available on Amazon!)

• Aromatica Calendula Juicy Cream

• COOLA Facial Sunscreen with SPF 50 (I actually don’t alternate this, but rather mix with whatever moisturizer I’m using in the morning!)

I switch between 2 moisturizers right now because I try to take my skin’s needs at that moment into account. I might feel really dry and then I’ll use my Aromatica moisturizer; I might be really oily or have just oiled my face, then I’ll use the H2O+, as it’s much lighter. It just depends! At night, I also top everything with the Youth to the People Superberry Hydrating Sleep Mask.

7. Stay Consistent.

The last and most important thing is: you’ve gotta follow the routine that works for you every single day. Every morning, every evening, even when you’re really tired. I’m not perfect; the last few nights, I’ve been exhausted and wasn’t doing my routine. Your girl’s face is blotchy, dry, and pretty gross this morning, so guess who is back on the bandwagon? Me.

I hope this helps you all if you’re dealing with dry, tired skin! Have anymore recommendations? Share them with me in the comments!

Disclaimer: Some links in this post are affiliate links! When you click through them, or purchase through them, I receive a small kickback. However, this post is not sponsored and all opinions remain my own—I use all these products! Thanks for visiting Writing Between Pauses. If you’d like to learn more about my disclosure policy, click here.

5 Tips for Marketing Your Brand During a Pandemic

I’m going to tell you a small annoyance I have: a lot of the women I follow who own businesses have tried to use the current social climate as an opportunity to sell more. To pivot their businesses, or increase their revenue. Here’s the thing: we’re all scared. We’re all nervous about what comes next because we simply don’t know.

One thing I always tell my clients is: you should never take advantage of certain situations to make sales. You can use a tragedy or a societal event to make sales. You can let those things guide your content. But that’s it.

To best illustrate this, here’s an example from back when I worked at an agency: after the devastating fires in California, one of our clients wanted to place targeted ads for their luxury products in the areas most effected by the fires. Their logic was that people needed a place to live, why not buy one of their products to live in?! I remember reading the emails, listening to the conversation, and thinking, “I don’t know how to make people have a heart.”

It goes without saying: we did not comply with their request. We recommended a few other options—such as gathering donations for those effected and driving them to the area, or donating a significant portion of sales percentages—and they didn’t like them. They wanted to make sales, period, on the backs of people who had lost everything they owned.

Friends, I can’t tell you how much this made me want to quit marketing. I think there are lots of misconceptions about marketing, but the one thing that is, occasionally, true is that some businesses will do anything to make money. The good thing is that many marketing agencies refuse to be as cutthroat as these businesses anymore: most agencies have high morals and a specific outlook on how to treat consumers. But battling with clients takes a lot of energy and clout.

I’ve been asked a lot lately about how businesses can best market their products right now. What is the right thing to do? What is the kind thing to do? How can you keep your business afloat and support your community and still participate in marketing so you don’t lose momentum?

Here’s a breakdown of what I’ve been telling my clients.

1. Use Common Sense.

It goes without saying, but: if it feels gross or wrong to do it, it probably is. Posting something that just doesn’t feel right… you probably already know it’s not right. Something that takes advantage of people’s fear (such as posting ads for masks or claiming products help or prevent COVID 19), or something that preys on people’s fears or insecurities… these aren’t good marketing practices even in the best of times.

In general, there are two rules here:

• Don’t post anything that can harm people. Will your marketing cause harm? Will it make people do something stupid (like rush out to buy something they do not need) out of fear or because they think what you said was true?

• Don’t make false claims. Right now, there is a lot of information out there on “this prevents COVID 19” or “this will keep you healthy.” The truth is there is no product you can buy and consume that will prevent you from getting COVID 19, so making claims otherwise is bullshit.

2. Chill Out on Heavy Sales.

Heavy sales-focused posts are going to rub most consumers wrong—and all marketers. I have been screenshotting ads that I feel are in poor taste. One I got recently was for a brand I love (I buy their products at Whole Foods all the time) and it was a special sale code using “COVID 19” or “STAY AT HOME” for a certain amount off. Big oof.

There is nothing wrong with advertising a sale right now. But make sure what you’re advertising is appropriate for the situation and you do so with care and kindness towards your community.

Here’s a good example:

• “We know many of us are at home, which is an incredible privilege. Right now, we are offering a sale on our X product; use code SUNDAY to get 10% off—and we’ll donate 10% of proceeds to [charity].”

Recognize and acknowledge that people might be struggling right now, especially financially.

3. Focus on Compassion.

Related to my last point: a lot of people are struggling now. Some mentally, some financially, some physically. People are ill. People are grieving.

Show some compassion.

If this means pivoting your content away from selling and more towards supporting your community (“what can I do for you? how can I help you? what charities should I donate to?”), then do it. If you have the ability, do it! It’s easy right now to be entirely focused on you and your business. We’re all worried, like I said. There is no point in trying to participate in the “worry Olympics” or trying to make hard times a competition. Yes, some people have it worse. We’re all struggling, though, and being kind of people is pretty much free.

Show some compassion to your customers. Send free product if you can. Cut people some slack.

4. We Don’t Need Another Work from Home Article.

Ok, I’m fully guilty of writing my own work from home article. But if I see one more huge brand posting their work from home tips, I’m going to scream.

After all, it was barely 6 months ago when a business in Eugene told me that they didn’t foresee a world where it was possible for people in my career to work 100% remotely and that asking to work from home so I could more effectively take care of my child was unrealistic. Who is laughing now, friends!? So yes, it sucks to see that very same business churning out work from home content, taking care of your children content, etc. It’s just frustrating for those of us who know that at least some of these businesses have not effectively supported the women or men in their employ who need the ability to work from home, either due to children, commute issues, or disabilities.

So, in short: we don’t need any more work from home content. We just need compassion, support, and a good laugh.

5. Think On Your Feet.

Things are changing every single day. Being able to pivot your content on a moment’s notice is going to be important. For many brands, the ability to stop their content right at the beginning of March was challenging, but it’s taught us one thing: as much as social media managers (like me!) like to have content planned and scheduled months in advance… the reality is that’s probably not an effective strategy in a world where things can change in a moment’s notice.

This also applies to replying to consumer complaints; being able to take on your followers (customers, fans, however you refer to them!) challenges and issues will be part of your strategy from here on out. Seeing a ton of the same complaint? The same issue? How can you help? Can you think of a meaningful response on the spot?

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I hope these tips help you market your brand in an uneasy time! Have additional suggestions or ideas? Let me know in the comments

Is it Too Early to Introduce Journaling to my Kids?

I’ll be the first to tell you: staying home all day with kids, with no break, and trying to keep them a) entertained, b) educationally stimulated, and c) emotionally taken care of is a challenge. When I had Forrest, I didn’t think that in 4 1/2 years I would be handed the absolute weirdest historical event to raise him in.

The other day, I was talking to my mother (on the phone, of course) about how hard it has been lately to get everything done and take care of Forrest. I usually don’t struggle with this day-to-day… but without preschool, without childcare, and without Danny now that he’s gone back to school, everything falls on me.

I don’t want Forrest’s first memories to be of this time, to be quite honest, but unfortunately it’s not up to me at this point; and I definitely don’t want his first memories to be of me losing my patience with him because I need to finish writing copy for a client. (As important as that copy is!)

As I’ve written, I’ve been working on developing some preschool activities for Forrest. I won’t say I’m homeschooling—it’s definitely not that strenuous, but I’m doing my best! He has always been a child that needs constant mental stimulation; he’s very good at playing independently, but it’s extremely curious and wants to ask questions and learn all the time. It’s one of my favorite things about him! But as a non-educator, it’s definitely a challenge for me as it’s definitely not my personality type. (You can read about how I’ve organized our daily schedule here! I have made some changes to this, so I’ll be writing an updated version soon.)

One thing I’ve started trying to incorporate daily is journaling. It got me thinking: when is it the right time to introduce journaling? I love journaling (you can read all my posts about it here) and it’s something I want Forrest to love too. It’s an incredibly valuable way to destress, record your memories, and focus on good memories—letting the others fall to the wayside.

Here’s what I learned through researching:

• It’s never too early to introduce writing skills. At 4, Forrest can write his name and write some simple words. He very badly wants to be able to write notes! This felt like the perfect time to help him work on his early writing skills. We’ve been doing lots of letter tracing, practicing with pencils, and more. A lot of learning to write is learning to hold a pencil and creating those muscle memories and groups.

• Keep it age appropriate. Your 5-year-old isn’t going to sit down and write a thoughtful journal entry. Keep it to writing about one event during the day and how they felt.

• Don’t take it too seriously. If it becomes frustrating, put it away for both of you.

• The benefits are numerous. Journaling, and learning to write early, has a lot of benefits: better communication skills, better writing and reading skills, and an opportunity to work through big emotions.

There doesn’t seem to be an age limit to introducing journaling!

Introducing Journaling to a 4-Year-Old

Did it go well at first? Not really. Forrest was a little perplexed by the exercise, but he’s come around. As I said, he really wants to write. Badly. He wants to be able to write notes, to read, to satisfy his curiosity. Journaling will be a very positive thing for him once he gets a bit better at writing.

We started with supplies.

I ordered Forrest a primary school notebook to start journaling in. It’s a a basic primary school notebook: the top half of the page is blank (for drawing a picture) and then has primary lining on the second half to write a description or journal entry. (There is also a space at the top to write the date!) Every day, I’ve been having him draw a picture about something he did during the day. The first day, he drew a picture of himself dancing. The second day, a picture of the apple crisp we baked. Then, I helped him write a sentence about it, as well as the day’s date. Usually, this is us sounding out words and writing letters.

To help him write, I also got him some basic pencils and some pencil grippers. The pencil grippers are triangular (I’m sure everyone reading this remembers them! I used them for years) and help new writers learn to hold a pencil. Plus, it widens the part they are gripping and makes it easier for little hands. I was going to order some of the thicker kindergarten pencils, but Danny encouraged me not to; it’s better for Forrest to learn to hold a thinner pencil correctly.

If you’ve got a 4-5 year old, these are all cheap supplies you can get just about anywhere and make writing easier.

We try to journal right after dinner or during quiet time. I want to teach him that it’s a good way to wind down in the evening, take a break, and think through the day. He sees me journal a lot and I’m hoping this becomes a habit that is easy for him to keep! Plus, it will be fun to look back on these journal entries later. During a quarantine, his memories are a mix of things we did and random things (like dancing, playing with his Superman toys, or taking a nap on the couch).

Now, it’s your turn: are you considering introducing journaling to your kids? What’s holding you back?

Disclaimer: This post does contain Amazon Affiliate links.

What My Self-Care Routine Looks Like Right Now

“I think I’ve been waiting for this my entire life,” I told my therapist almost two weeks ago.

I’m always waiting for the disaster a little bit. For the bad thing to happen. At every single job I’ve ever had, I’ve waited to be fired. “One day,” I would tell everyone, “they’ll just notice that I don’t know what I’m doing and they’ll fire me.” I’m always waiting for the big snowstorm, the power outage, the car accident. I’m always waiting for something to go wrong somehow. I await chaos at every moment—so when chaos erupts, I actually feel really calm and collected. I stop panicking.

I experienced this after I got laid off in July. I remember telling my therapist how energized I felt, how it felt like I’d been waiting for the shoe to drop for years. We talked then about what this meant, how to prepare for the inevitable comedown.

When I went to my therapist appointment two weeks ago on Wednesday, freshly sanitizing and ready to stay 6 feet away from my therapist, I again felt more calm than I had in ages. We talked about the same thing then: right now, I feel calm because this feels like something I was prepared for… but eventually, it going to wear off.

I’m not saying this to say, “look at me! I was prepared!” I wasn’t totally prepared. While I’m always on the edge of my seat, waiting for the big bad… I didn’t think it would be this. I’m not happy about it. That’s for sure.

I left my last therapy appointment having no idea when I’ll be able to go back to therapy. However, my therapist offered to do virtual or phone sessions, so that’s good to know. At the time, we just didn’t know what would stay open and essential and what wouldn’t. I instead left with a plan to establish a really strict self-care routine that would hopefully carry me through this weeks and prepare me for the ultimate moment when staying home 24/7 with two other people would become too much.

It seems like it might be helpful to share what I’m doing and how I’m keeping my routine in place. I even made a handy printable for you, if you want to start putting a self-care routine in place.

Self-Care versus Self-Soothing

I’m obviously not a mental health professional. However, my therapist has always divided my self-care routine into two separate spheres: self-care (that is, regimented things that help me to improve my mental health and create boundaries) and self-soothing (that is, activities that make me feel better on bad days.

Here are some examples. For me, a self-care item is: is keeping a routine for my day (wake up, make coffee, write in my journal for 20 minutes). A self-soothing item is: doing an Aztec clay face mask at the end of the day.

Does that make sense? Good. Let’s jump into how I structure my routine.

My Self-Care Routine

My routine is ultimately ruled by Forrest’s routine. I knew I was going to have to give him some structure immediately. When Oregon schools announced they were closed until March 31, and then, April 28, I knew that in order to survive, he needed a schedule.

I drew something up that day. It looks something like this:

• 7:30am - wake up, get dressed, go through what day it is

• 8:00am - breakfast

• 8:30am - TV time (Let’s Go Luna and Daniel Tiger on TV)

• 10:00am - Lesson 1

• 10:15am - Lesson 2

• 10:30am - Quiet Play Time

• 11:30am - Lunch

• 12:00pm - Outside time

• 1:30pm - Lesson 3

• 1:45pm - Lesson 4

• 2:00pm - Quiet Play Time

• 3:30pm - Help mom with dinner

• 4:30pm - Dinner time

• 5:30pm - Family time

• 6:30pm - Quiet Play Time

• 8:00pm - Bedtime

That’s just the morning. Here’s how my schedule fits in:

• 6:00am - I wake up, get dressed, wash my face, make coffee, journal, and then work until Forrest wakes up

• 7:30am - wake up, get dressed, go through what day it is

• 8:00am - breakfast

• 8:30am - TV time (Let’s Go Luna and Daniel Tiger on TV)

• During TV time, I catch up on work and do any chores, such as washing dishes or putting dinner in the crock pot.

• 10:00am - Lesson 1

• 10:15am - Lesson 2

• 10:30am - Quiet Play Time

• During quiet time, I usually try to either take a shower, work, or catch up on laundry/chores.

• 11:30am - Lunch

• 12:00pm - Outside time. We usually go on an hour+ walk or hike; this is good for me too!

• 1:30pm - Lesson 3

• 1:45pm - Lesson 4

• 2:00pm - Quiet Play Time

• During Quiet Play Time, I work.

• 3:30pm - Help mom with dinner

• 4:30pm - Dinner time

• 5:30pm - Family time

• 6:30pm - Quiet Play Time

• This is self-soothing time. I usually lie in bed and play Animal Crossing, read a book, do a face mask, whatever.

• 8:00pm - Bedtime

• After bedtime, I usually go through my to do list and see what I missed, transfer it to the next day, and make a game plan for what to hit during the day. I try to be in bed by 10pm, but sometimes that stretches to 11 or so.

Whew! I know that’s a lot of information. But I want to show you how my day fits into the schedule I’ve created for Forrest. His lessons aren’t full lessons; we usually read a book and do a worksheet or activity, paint a picture, or learn a song. (You can learn more about the resources I used for these lesson plans here.)

I try to hit a few big self-care routine pieces everyday:

• Having a routine immediately upon waking up that helps me feel energized.

• Giving myself time to work and get chores done as I need to (those quiet play times have helped a lot! Forrest’s room is a mess, but who cares).

• Taking at least an hour for myself in the evening to just relax and do something I really enjoy.

I know for many people, the idea of doing this with kids seems super challenging. Here’s the truth: Forrest interrupts me a lot. But we’ve been talking to him lately about a few things:

• When a door is closed, you knock and ask if it’s ok to come in. if the answer is no, then the answer is no.

• When I’m working, I need to work. The less interruptions, the sooner I can make an egg carton tree with him.

During this time, it’s all about survival. It’s ok if a schedule like this won’t work for you. I want you to have the tools you need to create a routine that works for you and if my routine helps you, then that’s great. If not, that’s ok too! However, if you are working from home for the first time, it is important to establish boundaries, if you have kids or a partner, that will help you get your work done and not feel totally overwhelmed. If you need work from home tips, here are mine.

I have also been trying to work in time to meditate each day—or at least sit, without a screen in front of me or a book or my journal or something, and just think and breathe. I really like this guide to beginning meditation.

I also created a handy-dandy printable for you to outline your own self-routine schedule. This is formatted by a checklist and includes a gratitude section; you can use it for daily journaling or just as a one-off. However you use it, I’d love to see it! You can use the hashtag #thisweeksgoldstar on Instagram.

I hope it helps you! I’m always here to chat. This is a tough time, but if we lean on each other, we’ll all be held up. Stay safe, stay home, and stay healthy!

Working from Home? Here Are My Top 4 Tips for Staying Productive

As we all work on social distancing to prevent a massive influx of those infected with COVID19, many jobs have moved to entirely remote positions. You might be one of those people: you’ve typically worked in office-only jobs, where you left everyday at the same time and knew what was expected.

First things first, working from home, especially right now with many people furloughed or laid off, is a huge privilege. I think we all know that!

It’s ok if you’re nervous about it too. It’s ok if you aren’t sure if you’ll like it. And it’s also ok if you know right now you don’t like it at all. That’s ok!

If you’re new to the working from home game, I want to help. Right now, there are so few things we can all do to help others and, as a fellow slightly displaced, a little confused worker, I want to help where I can. If there is one thing I know, it’s working from home! I am hoping that sharing a few tips for working from home will help at least once person.

If you want more posts about being productive while working from home, here are two of my favorites:

• How to know if working from home is for you

• How to practice self-care as a freelancer*

*Consider yourself an honorary freelancer now!

Now, let’s get to those tips.

1. Take Care of Yourself.

I want to tackle this one first because I think it’s the most important one. We are all going through something that is, quite honestly, very traumatic. Our lives are being completely turned upside down. We all have family and friends who are suddenly out of work. We all have immunocompromised, immunosuppressed, or at-risk family members and friends. Things are very stressful and it will be natural to have that stress keep up.

So most importantly, take care of yourself in whatever way you can. I highly recommend getting a self-care routine in place right from the get go. Why? Because the sooner you have that routine in place, the easier it will be to maintain when things get hard.

I always tell people there are two pieces of self-care: the actual self-care aspect (what you need to do to keep your mental health good) and self-soothing techniques. Here’s how they differentiate:

• Self care is: going to therapy; taking your medication; practicing deep breathing to slow your heart rate during a panic attack.

• Self-soothing is: taking a bubble bath; using a lotion that smells good and calms you down; turning the news off when you’re overwhelmed.

Spot the difference? I think for many, this makes it easier to understand. Your self-care routine should be a mix of all of these things. Now might be the time to sign up for Talkspace so you have access to a mental health professional. Or, if you already attend therapy, get your meetings arranged to be over Zoom or Skype now. Then, start thinking of self-soothing pieces you want. Do you want to set aside 40 minutes every evening for a bath? Schedule it in, babe!

2. Set Strict Work Hours.

I keep a work calendar for everyone I work with and I block out my work hours on every single one. If you text me outside of those work hours, or your email me on the weekend, I will not respond to you. Period. End of story. I used to be not so strict about those, but once Oregon implemented a stay-at-home order, I decided to be strict about it.

I like working. But I don’t like feeling overwhelmed by work.

So, my advice is this: make your work hours known and stick to them. Don’t let anyone talk you out of them. Not your boss. Not your coworkers. Not your partner who is inexplicably on a work call at 8pm. Don’t let them down it! Stick to your hours. Strictly. If you do decide to be loosy-goosy and start early, don’t work over 8 hours. You’re going to burn out; you’re going to get tired; you’re going to get overwhelmed and frustrated and stressed. Be kind to yourself. Set your work hours!!!

3. Designate a Work Space.

You might not have the space for an office. Trust me, I get it. My office used to be a landing on my stairwell. It was tiny and uncomfortable and I hated it in a lot of ways.

Even if you don’t have an office in your home or apartment, you can designate a space where The Work Happens. This might be your kitchen table, which has a nice plug. You might have a desk in your bedroom that works and has a window you can look out. Whatever works for you. Pick a work space and stick with it.

Just like setting your work hours, I want you to be strict about this with yourself. Here’s why:

• You have to maintain good posture and ergonomic working conditions. Why? Because this will vastly impact how you feel physically. Working on the couch sounds great until your back aches.

• You have a designated space where The Work Happens and when you are in that space, you work. When you are not in that space, you do not work. This is a big thing mentally. It will help you be more productive. I promise.

4. Practice Breaks.

Working from home means there are less interruptions. No coworkers stopping to chat for 15 or 20 minutes. No quick breaks to the bathroom where you end up joining a lively discussion about a TV show. No quick brainstorms. Everything is scheduled out.

That means you get less breaks, mentally. So, schedule breaks into your day. Take 10 minutes to call a friend or talk to your partner. Or take your dog for a walk. Make yourself a snack or a cup of coffee. Do something other than work for a few minutes, then get back to it. Breaking up the day will help you stay on task longer and not feel so burnt out and tired.

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There you have it! Those things might feel pretty basic, but as these days pass, I want you to focus on them and make sure to set and keep plenty of boundaries. Bringing your work into your home can be a great way to save money on gas and protect people from COVID19. But it can also be very stressful and overwhelming.

Here is a handy dandy graphic that breaks down the do’s and don’ts of working from home.

Life Lately: 5 Things I Learned This Month

Oh hey, long time no see!

I first started this blog post on March 11. I’ve deleted and rewritten the whole thing at least 3 times. It’s really hard to put into words how our lives have all changed since then, right? Originally, I wanted this blog post to be a write up about where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing—a sort of call back to the old days of blog posts when things were more personal, less “evergreen”.

Not only has the last month felt like the fastest and longest of my life, I feel like our world has pretty much completely changed. Will things be any different after this? Or will everything be different?

I posted this on Twitter, but I really do think the first boom of bloggers in 2009-2011 was in part caused by the recession in 2008-2009. I know for me, I started blogging from my dorm room in 2009 when shit was going absolutely to hell in the “real world.” When I graduated in 2011, I couldn’t find a job—so I threw myself into blogging, it became part of my identity, and boom! Became part of my career, in many ways.

I wonder how this—that is, what is happening now, alongside the economic impacts—will change blogging in the future. I’ll admit to being incredibly frustrated by the rise of influencers; it’s made having my own blog more complicated, as I feel like I have to compete to work with brands who would prefer a ton of followers over genuine readership. (This isn’t a brag; my blog gets a significant amount of traffic, but God, do I hate Instagram.)

This is all to say one thing: in February, when I started a new temp job, I made the decision to step away from my blog for a little while to decide what to do.

The truth is that I love blogging. When I was laid off in July, I thought blogging might be a key to being part of my career. But the more I’ve tried to make this blog part of my career, the more miserable I have felt about the whole thing. I like writing about whatever I want to write about. I want to review make up again. I want to write about whatever I want again. I don’t want to have to worry about discount codes and monetization and promoting. I just want to write.

That was a lot of what I wanted to say when I started this blog post. Then… COVID19 happened. What can I write that hasn’t already been written?

The last month of my life has really flown by. For a lot of reasons! I often find when writing these life update posts, it’s best to structure things in “what I’ve learned.” So, let’s chat, shall we? Here’s everything I’ve learned in the last month.

1. Always be prepared.

My husband, Danny, has a relative that everyone makes fun of for saving everything. She saves Cool Whip containers and the remnants of every meal, no matter how small. To them, this was sort of a begrudging tendency towards penny pinching, caused by growing up in the midwest during the Depression.

Do you wonder what effect this quarantine will have on us? On our children?

Will I ever let us go without having a small stockpile of toilet paper, laundry soap, and hand soap ever again? Will I pay more attention to have nonperishables in my pantry? Will Forrest be more conscious of how his health effects those around him? Will he be offended by extreme hoarding?

Just something I’ve been thinking about. But this has made me realize how much more prepared I need to be. When the Governor of Oregon, Kate Brown, announced that schools would be closed until the end of March (and then, April 28), I immediately thought, “oh shit, what are we going to do!?” I didn’t have anything. I had nothing for craft projects. My printer was out of ink. My pantry was looking sparse.

I thought I learned my lesson during the snowstorm of February 2019, when we only had a few gallons of water saved up and we ended up melting snow on our wood stove to flush toilets every day. (It took hours.) Danny and I made a preparedness plan then. But, then, life got in the way. I got laid off. I started freelancing. I gave up on finding a job. We got busy. And we stopped being so prepared. I stopped grabbing a few extra cans of soup or broth when I went to the grocery store.

Anyway, if nothing else, this has taught me: always be prepared. Have hand sanitizer and bleach on hand at all times.

2. Late February was probably not an ideal time to start a new job (or maybe it was?).

That’s an exciting announcement though, isn’t it? I started a temporary job, only supposed to last 3 months or so, in late February. I was supposed to start March 1, as I am covering a woman on maternity leave, but things happen, you know. I started, got used to everything, and then… COVID19 hit.

It was like a wallop to the face, huh?

It’s been great though. If there is one way to show people I’m a great employee, it’s really keeping my head during all this crisis. The team transitioned to working entirely from home—and I was already there, with everything I needed to make it work. It felt good. It feels so good to be part of a team again. I love it so much and I love the work that I’m doing, because I feel like I’m learning a lot about what I do in a different way.

It’s definitely a weird time, at least looking at economic impacts, to be in a very temporary space. That being said: I’ve been a temporary space since July. I’m used to it and I think I will be ok after this. If I can survive everything I went through last summer, I can make it through another uneasy, difficult summer. (I wish I didn’t have to, but there we are!)

3. It’s ok to let go of the routines.

I am a routine driven person. I write about it a lot. I like having a routine. I like feeling like I have control.

But sometimes, the routine is just too much.

When Forrest’s school was shut down (right before Danny’s birthday—sorry Danny!), I immediately started making a schedule for him. I knew for his sanity, and mine, we needed to implement something right off the bat so he would feel safe and secure.

But we also needed to explain why he wasn’t going to school anymore.

This was all a big bummer because Forrest had been struggling with anxiety about school for a few months—which was a bit odd for him, but as a family, we were a bit all over the place in October to January. It’s sad for me and him that once he was more comfortable with school… it was gone. He’s been sad and confused about what’s happening, but at 4, I don’t really want to scare the pants off of him.

I knew he needed a routine. I knew I wanted to keep school going for him in whatever small way I could.

But each day, the routine works up until a certain point. And then it no longer works at all. Usually that point is about 7:30 at night. In my ideal schedule, we would get Forrest ready for bed, snuggle him in, and say night night.

That is not how it works. We’ve ended most days the past two weeks with brushing teeth and then Forrest crawls into bed with me to watch a movie. I know, I know… this is potentially the worst sleep habit. But he’s only 4 and he’ll only be 4 for a little while. I don’t want his memories of this time to be scary or weird or dystopian like mine are. I want him to remembering getting to watch his favorite movies every night before falling asleep with me.

So yeah, the routine is important. But I kind of had to let it go too.

4. Turning off the news is ok.

Every day for work, we do a check-in and one of the things we do is talk about any positive or negative news we’ve heard that others might find interesting. For the first few days of my entire team being at home, we all had a ton of news to share: this state was doing this, or we learned this about the virus. Whatever.

By Thursday, we were all really quiet during that part of the meeting. A lot of us simply couldn’t pay attention to the news as much. It was too overwhelming. Too scary. Too much information in some ways and too much of it was misinformation one way or another. We all had to step away.

it felt really good. I believe in being an informed citizen and right now, it feels a bit like my job to be up-to-date on what’s going on. Comparatively, I’m good at staying up to date on just about everything. But at a certain point, it’s not just collecting information. It’s obsessively trying to stay on top of the situation as a way to calm my anxiety—and thereby, making it worse. Every piece of information I learned, I found myself getting more and more anxious. Being snippy. Being unable to focus on tasks.

I stayed off Twitter over the weekend. I muted related terms on my Twitter feed. I tried to stay off Facebook and Instagram. It felt good. I read. I watched TV. I wrote. It felt good.

So yes, I like to stay informed and I’ll probably start to view a few select sources for COVID19 information. But if you, like me, are very easily overwhelmed by too much information, let me be the one to tell you: you have permission to stop paying attention to the news.

5. I have so many projects to finish.

I have all the time in the world now. No weekend trips. No spring break trip that Danny and I have had planned for months. No going to Target and lunch on the weekends. I can’t even visit my mom! We are at home, doing the responsible thing. We moved into our house in July: 8 long months ago. I have so many projects to finish. Rooms I haven’t painted. Boxes that I still have not unpacked. Closets that are still just stuffed with a mishmash of things. Woof! I guess now is the time. I started a list. I’m check it twice. Don’t judge me.