Reflection: How Was Blogtober?

Blogtober: the best of times, the worst of times. October is my favorite month of the year and so it always feels like the shortest. This year especially it seemed to really fly by. 

I wanted to talk about how Blogtober, as an exercise, made me feel. At the end of October, I sent out a newsletter where I talked about how I enjoyed Blogtober because being busy, mentally and physically, helps me to relax and keeps me from going into an anxiety spiral. For that reason, Blogtober was really fun and I had one of my best “mental health” months for a while. 

The Pros

What are the pros of Blogtober?

Firstly, I had the absolute best month, sponsorship opportunity, views/visits, and social media wise, in a long time. I know these numbers are slightly inflated because I was posting every day and so, purely, I just had more posts for people to visit. But after so long of feeling like I was putting in so much effort and seeing no growth, it made me so happy. I feel like I picked up some genuine new readers too (hello!) and email subscribers. I’m so happy to have you here. 

Secondly, Blogtober gave me some really good ideas as to what kind of content people like the most, what brings in new readers, and what helps me keep readers coming back. These are technical, kind of business-focused topics that sometimes bloggers don’t talk about. I fully believe that blogging should be about enjoyment, first and foremost, but at the end of the day, blogging into a void isn’t exactly fulfilling! 

The Cons

Firstly, there were a few times throughout the month where I thought: is my content suffering here? I personally picked each topic I wrote about; each blog post was from a list of ones I had been meaning to write. But when you’re writing a ton in advance, not having time to take pictures for each, relying on stock photos… it starts to feel a little anonymous, you know? However, I don’t think my content suffered overall; sometimes, I just felt a bit rushed and didn’t write what I really wanted to write. 

Another con: sometimes it felt like my Blogtober posts got lost in the jumble of other Blogtober posts, as well as my own. At a certain point, I completely forgot what was scheduled for what day; it was really hard for me to remember, working a week or two in advance of each post. It’s not how I usually operate, but it’s what I had to do to stay on top of things! I do need to work on being more organized (oops) about my blog posts, but I’ve yet to find a system that truly works for me.

What did you think of Blogtober? Did you participate? Would you? 

How I Plan to Win NaNoWriMo

I wrote last week about what NaNoWriMo is and why I personally choose to participate. 

This week, I wanted to talk about my NaNoWriMo process. I’ve touched on this a few times here and here, but I’ve never gone in depth. 

I have a really specific process for outlining for NaNoWriMo. You read that correctly: I’m a planner, not a pantser. (Confused by those terms? Click here.) 

The very first year I did NaNoWriMo, I was a pantser—and it is crystal clear in the novel I produced! It is easily my weakest year. However, since then, I’ve written outlines and followed a detailed plan. I’ve worked out a system that absolutely works for me and if you’re already struggling to stay afloat this month, I think it can work for you too. 

1. Write a Synopsis

First things first, I write a brief synopsis. This is just my idea. Usually, it’s something very simple like: a marathon runner witnesses a gruesome murder. As she tries to put the pieces back together, the victim’s identical twin destroys evidence of her sister’s secret life. This is the basis of my idea: no more, no less. (This synopsis is verbatim from my 2013 novel.) 

2. Write 3 plot crucial points. 

The first point is usually the beginning piece of information in the synopsis; in my example, it’s the murder that the runner witnesses. The second point is usually the climax of the story, when the tension is highest; in my example, the climax was the arrest of the killer. The third point in the conclusion; in this case, it’s the murderers trial. 

3. Start Your Outline

From there, you have all the information you need: beginning, middle, and end. Now, it’s time to get into the nitty gritty. When it comes to writing a detailed outline, I have a very specific process. Here it is. 

A NaNoWriMo novel is 50,000 words; so, I plan 10 chapters that are 5,000 words, at least, each. Each chapter has 5 scenes of at least 1,000 words. If I can plan more words or more scenes, that’s great, but that is the bare minimum. 

On my outline, I name each chapter, identify each scene, and briefly describe each scene. It might be something as simple as, Rory, the runner, returns home to find her boyfriend, James, has left her a letter. Or, it might be something as complicated as: Molly returns home to search her sister’s bedroom, where she finds a black notebook that her sister used to journal and a stash of cash, as well as other assorted possessions that seem out-of-character. 

I also usually place my big three plot points: the beginning plot point usually goes in chapter 1 or 2; the climax usually occurs somewhere between chapter 6 and chapter 8, and then chapters 9-10 deal with the conclusion. 

Outlining in this way always gives me a scene to work towards and a goal to hit. I know when I start a new scene, I need to write a bare minimum of 1,000 words. And as I’m writing through the month, I may add additional scenes or break scenes up into small, vignette-style scenes… but I always have something to move on to, even if I’m experiencing writer’s block. 

4. Edit your outline. 

I usually write my outline in September. Yep, September! Then, in late October, I read over the entire thing and make any changes: I add details, write character descriptions, move scenes around, add scenes, change plot points… Basically, I fine tune everything so that when November starts, it’s as easy as pie. 

What is NaNoWriMo?

Oh, you thought I'd take a break after Blogtober? Well, that would probably be a good idea. Instead, I'm taking on NaNoWriMo and I plan to blog through the entire month. Wow! Also, I'm pre-writing December content for Blogmas. Uh oh, I've overbooked myself! 

It was 2010 when I decided to take the plunge and do NaNoWriMo for the first time. I’d heard of it through a few friends throughout college—I distinctly remember one of my good friends making an attempt in 2009—but I’d never committed to it myself. I knew I was better at writing short form than long form and I felt pigeon holed into that. 

However my senior year, I was living alone in a little apartment off campus without heating; I had a lot of spare time despite having a full schedule. I spent a lot of time with friends, or studying in the library, or working out in my apartment just to stay warm. I figured I might as well fill the time and take on something big, right? 

2010 was the first year I won. I won in 2012, 2013, 2014, and 2016 as well. I don’t think I attempted in 2011; I can’t totally remember and I can’t find any evidence of a story, that’s for sure! It should go without saying: that first novel in 2010 was bad. I distinctly remember halfway through the month losing my notes I’d written—so I suddenly couldn’t recall how old characters were, their full names, how they were related. Halfway through, it just turned into a brain dump mess. 

My novels have steadily gotten better since then. 2010 was tragic, and so was 2012; 2013 has a good idea and I remember really liking what I wrote, but reading through it recently, it is also tragic. 2014 is quite good; with a little hard work, I think it could be really good. And 2016 is my best novel yet and, funny enough, was the easiest year I can remember winning. I was always ahead on my daily work count. 

As I go into my 6th time doing NaNoWriMo, I wanted to talk about what NaNoWriMo is and why I do it. 

What is NaNoWriMo? 

NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, aka November. It’s a month where writers attempt to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. You write round 1,670 words a day. You can sign up on NaNoWriMo.org to officially commit (it’s free, don’t worry) and be verified through their word counting system. (Although, as a warning, their word counting system is always at least 4,000 words off my word documents counter! So write more than 50,000 before you verify or you’ll be mad.) 

For lots of writers, NaNoWriMo gives them a community to work on their writing skills, get inspiration and feedback, and find kinship with other people. 

Why I Do NaNoWriMo

I recently posted a thread on Twitter about how I don’t do NaNoWriMo, and I don’t write in general, with any thought of publishing. The truth is, I don’t want to be published. I used to think that was my dream, but I realize now that it’s just not something I want to pursue; I am happy to write my passion projects, the books I want to read, and leave them at the end. I love the novel I wrote last year for NaNoWriMo and even my husband says I should attempt to get it published; but I just don’t want to! It’s too personal. I write because it’s my hobby, because it’s how I motivate myself, because I need to create to feel happy. But for me, publishing isn’t the end goal. 

Are you doing NaNoWriMo this year? 

Is it your first year taking on NaNoWriMo? Or are you an old timer like me? I’d love to connect with you on Twitter so we can motivate each other, talk about our books, and grouse about the NaNoWriMo word counter! Follow me here and send me a note! 

My Favorite Weekly Bullet Journal Layout

I've been bullet journaling for about two years now. I primarily use it for work, but at home, I use a bullet journal to do my daily journals. I find it's a lot less intimidating to simply write notes in a little box, as opposed to looking at an entire blank page. I use the space to also write my focus for the week (like reducing my anxiety or forgiving myself for making mistakes), as well as goals and track my work outs. 

Above, you can see my absolute favorite weekly layout. I don't like a ton of decoration, but I do use my embarrassingly large washi tape collection to make things a little pretty. It's neat and orderly and I have just enough space in each box to write important tasks and appointments, as well as to write my evening notes. On Sundays, I write a longer journal entry where I reflect on my week, what went wrong, what went right, and what I can do different next week. Then I make my next weeks layout with a specific focus on an eye on the past week. 

I wanted to share what my weekly layout looks like in my bullet journal for a few reasons: 

1. Bullet journaling can seem really intimidating when you see the amazing art pieces some people do in theirs! But realistically, I don't think you have to go crazy in a bullet journal. 
    
2. It's nice to see how someone realistically uses a bullet journal. I'm never going to get track of all my habits, my savings, my budget in a notebook. That's just not how my brain works! But I do try to keep a journal so that I can remember when things happen and my son can have a record of what life was like with him as a toddler. 

I keep my Pinterest journals board updated with interesting bujo layouts. You can check it out here. I'm always making little tweaks to my weekly layout--like changing up fonts, color schemes, and more--but I think picking one you like and sticking with it is the best way to figure out what works, so you can better use your bullet journal. 

How to Make Your Summer Better (Even if You Hate Summer)

I know, I know. Everyone is supposed to love summer. It's sunny! It's warm! There are barbecues and pool parties and everything! Sorry, I'm not buying it. When was the last time I was invited to a pool party? That's right--never, because I don't live in an area where in-ground pools are common.

Summer is classified as "fine" in my book. I don't like it, but I don't really hate it. It's nice that my husband gets the summer off; it's nice that the weather is nicer and we can go outside (minus the horde of horrible bugs that plagues us). Those things are nice. 

That being said, summer can be better. I recently posted a thread of ways to make your summer better, right now. This thread was for if you have anxiety, if you feel bored, if you feel like you just aren't doing the right "summer things." 

When I was younger, I definitely always felt like I was "wasting" my summers. (Looking back, I was. So many summers off!) Summers are about living it up, right? And what do you do if you hate summer and you feel insecure about your hatred of summer? Here's the original thread if you want to check it out. However, it can broken down to three key steps. 

1. Wear your sunscreen. 

Do you feel like I harp on about this? It's because it's serious. On a podcast I listen to (All Killa, No Filla, if you're interested), one of the hosts said she goes tanning once a year; her doctor told her, straight up, she's giving herself cancer. And that's the truth: laying out; getting sunburned without worrying about it; and getting sun damage is giving yourself cancer. Don't do it! Also, sunburns hurt. Here are my tips for protecting that beautiful epidermis of yours. 

2. Wear what you want.  

Whatever! Going to a pool party (you lucky dog, you)? Wear the bikini. Feeling stressed about it? Does the thought of putting on that bikini make you feel stressed? Then don't. Don't wear the bikini. Wear a cute maxi dress instead. Or your favorite leggings. Or sweatpants! Wear what makes you feel comfortable and confident. If anyone asks, just say, "It's really none of your business."

3. Eat what you want.

So you took my advice on Twitter and went on a spontaneous trip. You find yourself staring down a slice of pizza, or a massive ice cream cone. You think about those goals you set for yourself: eating less dairy; making healthier choices. Your mouth is watering just looking at the ice cream. 

Girl, do it. Eat the ice cream. Eat the pizza. Eat a big, beautiful healthy salad tomorrow. Enjoy a smoothie in the morning. Chow down on nachos when offered. Life is too short to spend it trying to dictate what you enjoy every moment of the day. Moderation is important. 

10 Years Later: High School

A few weeks ago, in my newsletter, I wrote about how my 10 year high school reunion was coming up. Can you believe that? I find it hard to believe that I graduated 10 years ago--and of course, that means I graduated from college 6 years ago. 

I feel very old saying, "I blinked and it was gone." In many ways, I still feel very young. But some days, like when my knees hurt or I'm so tired I let my son watch his Elmo DVD for the fifth time and lie on the couch, I feel positively ancient. 

This all got me thinking though: what really has changed about me in those 10 years? 

• I went blonde. 
• I got a pixie cut. 
• I dyed my hair red about 100 times. 
• I grew my hair out. 
• I cut it short again. Repeat 4 times. 
• I gained weight. 
• I lost weight. 
• I gained weight again. 
• I started a fashion blog. 
• I quit my fashion blog. 
• I started a lifestyle blog. 
• I quit that lifestyle blog. 
• I started this blog. 
• I started Twitter. 
• I joined Instagram. 
• Pinterest happened. 
• I started dating Danny. 
• I got engaged to Danny. 
• I married Danny. 
• I had a baby. 
• I got a bunch of jobs. 
• I quit a bunch of jobs. 
• I did way more internships that I ever thought would be necessary. 
• I quit a lot of internships, too. 
• I worked a lot of early mornings in coffee shops. 
• I spent hours and hours and hours reading about blogging. 
• I got a job I love. 
• I made a lot of friends through blogging. 
• Made a lot of creepy enemies too! 

And that's all I can think of just off the top of my head. And that's just the things I've done. 

It's hard to always make a list of the ways I've changed over the years. I sometimes feel like I am still that 18-year-old girl, but I also know that she and I are two very different people. I think she'd be really disappointed by where I am--and also a little relieved that I'm not an absolute failure. I'd love to tell her how great the next 5 years will be for her, and really, that makes up for the 3 years that follow that time span ("the bad times"). I wish I could tell my high school self that things will be ok, I don't need to develop the Type A personality I currently have, and that it's ok to relax, and have fun, and you don't have to work 100% of the time all the time. 

What have you learned since graduating high school? 

Guest Post: 26 Is Still Mid-20's, Right?

I'm very excited about this guest post. I'd like to introduce you all to my sister-in-law, Amy: she is one of the kindest, most positive people I know, alongside being incredibly motivated and ambitious. I hope you all enjoy this guest post! 

I’m a Gemini (with Aries rising). It has never been up for debate. I have been called a “cusp” baby, but let’s be real, Cancers are too moody and introspective for me to truly relate. I meet all the Gemini stereotypes: I am outgoing, can come off a little immature, and make friends easily. I enjoy reading my horoscope every week, and married an Aquarius, my “most compatible sign.” All this to say, my birthday is coming up.

I’m one of “those” people when it comes to birthdays. I send cards to all my family and friends, I write hysterical birthday texts, and my Instagram is full of birthday wishes. I love singing off key, I love watching gifts get opened, I love EVERYTHING about birthdays. I even love my own birthday and I have a yearlong countdown to June 19. This year though... this year is different. This year, I am suddenly aware of my age, and I must say, I have some weird feelings about turning 26.

I can honestly say that I’m not afraid of aging. I am looking forward to being like 35 and finally feeling like I have my shit together. This year, it isn’t about the age, or realizing my mortality, as with most women, my insecurity is about my mom.

26 was my mom’s biggest year. When she was 26, my mom found out she was pregnant, learned her mother’s stage IV cancer had returned, lost her mom, and then had a baby 6 weeks later. 26 is a looming age, one of those ages I always thought was far away. To be 26, to be old enough to have a child and recover from losing your mom, a person would have to be mature, would have to be aware, would have to have a full handle on the world and on their life. I don’t, and I’m starting to realize, neither did my mom.

My mom wasn’t a full adult, she wasn’t “ready,” she hadn’t gleaned all she needed from her mom when she was 26. She was still finding her way in the world, she was buying her first new car, she was starting her career and marriage, she was just like me. I love being compared to my mom, I love when people tell me we look alike, that we talk the same, and that we have the same interests. I love our similarities, but I really hope that we don’t share the cursed year of 26.

In addition to the shred of looming dread, I really am looking forward to this year. I have started my career, and I’m good at it. I just bought a new car, I can easily afford my rent and monthly expenses for the first time since college, I am getting the hang of this whole being married thing, and I have a sense of confidence that I have not experienced before, and I can’t wait to continue to grow. I have set some personal goals for the year, a few professional ones, and am excited to start tackling them. 26 will be a great year, a year I have always known was coming, and I’m ready for it.  

About Amy

I’m Amy, Michelle’s Chaco wearing, BB Cream and brown mascara using sister-in-law. I love Portland, higher education, and smart boss ladies, specifically Hillary Clinton. You can find me on the internet as @amynelmson.

Why I Got Rid of All My Notebooks

I've been receiving notebooks as gifts for as long as I can remember. Well, as long as I was telling people I wanted to be a writer. Notebooks are easy gifts: they can be beautiful, they can be practical, and it's an easy writing accessory that everyone understands. 

As someone who has kept a journal my entire life, these notebook gifts have been a blessing, honestly. I've rarely had to buy my own journals, especially if someone goes above-and-beyond and gives me a Moleskine for Christmas. However, it also has meant that I've always had a surplus of notebooks. 

In fact, this surplus started to get really embarrassing when I was pregnant. I unearthed a box of blank notebooks while getting organized and cleaning out Forrest's room. I had a stack of empty notebooks on my desk, on the bookshelf in my office, in a drawer under my desk... I had notebooks. I had notebooks upon notebooks. I had more notebooks than I would ever use in my life. Why? Because I cannot hand write fiction, or poetry, or anything. The only thing I use notebooks for is journaling. And a girl can only journal so much. 

It was time to bite the bullet. I always wanted to be the kind of person who could quietly sit with a notebook and write a story. At least get out the bare bones of it. I like journaling by hand and I like taking notes; I like writing out my grocery lists and to do lists. But trying to describe something, to actually write, by hand is a huge challenge for me. I know myself well enough now to know that it's just never going to happen. That's fine! 

So I had to get rid of all those notebooks. 

Some of them were beautiful, and expensive. Some of them I had bought myself, sure that the "right notebook" would spur my creativity. Some were cheap ones I'd bought in the last days of School Supply sales. Some were gifts. Some were party favors, or I received free from work. 

They all went. Into a box, that went to Goodwill, that hopefully sold them to someone who needed them, who can actually write in a notebook. It felt weird to let go of them, to let go of the idea of the kind of person I thought I could try to be.