Guest Post: 26 Is Still Mid-20's, Right?

I'm very excited about this guest post. I'd like to introduce you all to my sister-in-law, Amy: she is one of the kindest, most positive people I know, alongside being incredibly motivated and ambitious. I hope you all enjoy this guest post! 

I’m a Gemini (with Aries rising). It has never been up for debate. I have been called a “cusp” baby, but let’s be real, Cancers are too moody and introspective for me to truly relate. I meet all the Gemini stereotypes: I am outgoing, can come off a little immature, and make friends easily. I enjoy reading my horoscope every week, and married an Aquarius, my “most compatible sign.” All this to say, my birthday is coming up.

I’m one of “those” people when it comes to birthdays. I send cards to all my family and friends, I write hysterical birthday texts, and my Instagram is full of birthday wishes. I love singing off key, I love watching gifts get opened, I love EVERYTHING about birthdays. I even love my own birthday and I have a yearlong countdown to June 19. This year though... this year is different. This year, I am suddenly aware of my age, and I must say, I have some weird feelings about turning 26.

I can honestly say that I’m not afraid of aging. I am looking forward to being like 35 and finally feeling like I have my shit together. This year, it isn’t about the age, or realizing my mortality, as with most women, my insecurity is about my mom.

26 was my mom’s biggest year. When she was 26, my mom found out she was pregnant, learned her mother’s stage IV cancer had returned, lost her mom, and then had a baby 6 weeks later. 26 is a looming age, one of those ages I always thought was far away. To be 26, to be old enough to have a child and recover from losing your mom, a person would have to be mature, would have to be aware, would have to have a full handle on the world and on their life. I don’t, and I’m starting to realize, neither did my mom.

My mom wasn’t a full adult, she wasn’t “ready,” she hadn’t gleaned all she needed from her mom when she was 26. She was still finding her way in the world, she was buying her first new car, she was starting her career and marriage, she was just like me. I love being compared to my mom, I love when people tell me we look alike, that we talk the same, and that we have the same interests. I love our similarities, but I really hope that we don’t share the cursed year of 26.

In addition to the shred of looming dread, I really am looking forward to this year. I have started my career, and I’m good at it. I just bought a new car, I can easily afford my rent and monthly expenses for the first time since college, I am getting the hang of this whole being married thing, and I have a sense of confidence that I have not experienced before, and I can’t wait to continue to grow. I have set some personal goals for the year, a few professional ones, and am excited to start tackling them. 26 will be a great year, a year I have always known was coming, and I’m ready for it.  

About Amy

I’m Amy, Michelle’s Chaco wearing, BB Cream and brown mascara using sister-in-law. I love Portland, higher education, and smart boss ladies, specifically Hillary Clinton. You can find me on the internet as @amynelmson.

10 Cheap & Easy Summer Date Ideas

When I told Danny, my husband, I was writing this post, I said, "Have any date ideas? Cheap and easy?" 

"Cheap and easy? That's you, alright." 

Har har har, very funny. 

But really, as parents to a toddler, we don't have the time or money for elaborate dates anymore. We went to a wedding in April that left me absolutely destroyed for the rest of the week. We were out until 7pm at the latest. Oops. Combine with the fact that I'd rather buy Forrest a new toy than "waste money" on a movie or lunch, we like to keep things simple. 

That was the motivation behind this post: not everyone likes dates that end up with a sad, empty little bank account. Some people want to go on adventures that don't cost money, either because they prefer it or it's a necessity. This post is for those people. 

Here are 10 things that Danny and I love doing together that are cheap, relatively easy to accomplish, and perfect for summer. 

1. Volunteer at your local humane society or rescue. 

If you're the type of person who just wants to pet dogs or play with cats all day, listen, you need to be volunteering at your local animal shelter, humane society, or rescue. Sign up immediately; have your boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, whoever sign up with you. Together, you can walk dogs, play with cats, and help a great local organization. Do it. 

2. Go hiking. 

Research your local parks and find a great hiking trail. Danny and I love going on nature walks and hikes together. It's something we can't really do with Forrest yet--I can wear him, but an added 24 pound weight while walking isn't ideal--but it's a super fun date. If a little sweaty. 

3. Visit the lake. 

Have a local lake? Go there. You don't need to bring a picnic or throw a party. Just roll a blanket out on the shores and spend some time together, just you, your honey, and the water. 

4. Go for a drive. 

Back in the old days, going for drives was a big deal. It was something people just did. Sometimes, Danny and I just like to pack up the car, grab a drink (coffee is best in the morning), get a snack, and go driving. We'll eat cookies or crackers, or bring sandwiches... and just drive. 

5. Go antique hunting. 

Have a local place you've been dying to visit? Spending a day looking at antiques, even if you don't buy a thing, is super fun; you can learn tons about history from antique shop owners. 

6. Have an at-home coffee date. 

Brew a pot of coffee and clean up the house together. Then collapse on the couch and chat. A date is all about spending time together, so keep the TV off, turn on some music or a podcast you've been wanting to listen together, and enjoy. 

7. Work out together. 

This is a date that Danny and I love. We've both been working on regularly and we are looking forward to being able to work out together. It's way more fun to do cardio with someone by your side and it's way less intimidating to use that intense equipment in the weight room with a partner. 

8. Go to the library. 

It's nerd paradise, honestly. 

9. Volunteer at a local race or event. 

Is there a local 5K or benefit walk? Sign up! Here in Oregon, there is always a 5K, 10K, or benefit walk/run going on, so it's a great opportunity to sign up, throw orange slices to people who are very good at running long distances, and have fun. 

10. Take on a project together. 

For Danny and I, this would be a way to end our marriage (every time we successfully put together a shelf, I really do belief we are more stable as a couple), but for others, taking on a project, like painting the kitchen or redoing the bathroom, is a great way to spend a weekend, add a little value to your home, and feel super accomplished. 

4 Summer Toddler Essentials

Summer weather has just barely started here in Oregon. If you follow me on Instagram, you've seen a few stories about playing outside with Forrest in the afternoon. One day, the weather even topped 75 degrees, a true feat! 

However, as the summer rapidly approaches, I start thinking about all the things that toddler's need during the day--especially during the summer. If your toddler is like my toddler, they are, essentially, needy creatures. 24/7 need. And again, if your toddler is like my toddler, they want to be outside, and playing, and not eating or sleeping or drinking, 100% of the time. 

For that reason, I made a list of our summer essentials. The 4 things that, if nothing else, I will make sure we have to keep Forrest entertained and healthy. Here they are. 

1. Lots of sunscreen. 

If you've ever read my blog (and fingercrossed you have), you know that I wear sunscreen all year round. I'm incredibly pale and very prone to sun damage. Needless to say, my son did not inherit my husband's olive-toned, hearty skin. Ugh. He gets absolutely slathered before we go outside, even on overcast days. We are barely making it through molars; I am not adding sunburn to that mix! 

I'm a big fan of Babyganics sunscreen (as well as their other products) for my son. He has pretty sensitive skin (again, like mine, sorry kid!) and gets rashes very easily. I have found that Babyganics is the only thing that doesn't end up giving him a bumpy rash. Also, the sunscreen sticks are super convenient.

2. Hats.

Being totally honest, I really despite the hats that are available for toddlers. They're all bucket hats. Yes, all of them. It's awful. I guess they're cute, if you stretch your imagination and accept that anything slightly smaller than normal is cute. But they're still bucket hats. 

As ugly as I find them though, I put one on Forrest's little head every time we go outside. Why? It covers his face, protecting his eyes and face from the sun. Again: sun damage. If your toddler has more hair than mine (which, 98% of toddlers do, unfortunately), you might be able to skip a hat if you get a good layer of sunscreen on the face. But for the bald toddlers out there, solidarity; my kid has to wear one of these things. (This one from Carter's isn't too tragic, and even with Forrest's 66% size head, he can fit into the 9m size!)  

3. A toddler leash

You read that right! You see that picture correctly! I am recommending, yes, a leash for your child. Here's why: toddlers are super independent. Their growing independence is linked to their bad behavior (terrible 2s, anyone?), their sleep regressions (ugh), and their occasional refusal to eat. Those trips to the zoo, to Target, to Disneyland, to the grandparents, they don't want to be held. They don't want to be worn. They don't want to sit in their hot, uncomfortable stroller. They wanna walk, baby!

So let them. Buy the leash. I like these backpack versions. (We actually own a dog-shaped version ourselves.) They can love it by helping you put their things into it: a favorite toy or book, a sippy cup, a sunscreen stick, and then zipping it up. Then attach the leash and let them get their independence on while also being able to keep them close. It's a win-win. 

4. Some kind of outdoor toy

I am not personally a fan of the water table (in Oregon, these just mold within a few weeks), but some people (and climates) totally love them. If you're really coveting the one in the photo, you can check it out here. Otherwise, I have a few other suggestions: 

• Bubbles
• Sand toys (even if you don't have a sand box or table) 
• Sidewalk chalk
• Toy brooms
• Soccer ball or tennis balls

Basically, I'm a fan of keeping outdoor toys simple. Forrest has the most fun outside with his little bucket of sand toys, some bubbles, and nature, honestly. 

Why I Got Rid of All My Notebooks

I've been receiving notebooks as gifts for as long as I can remember. Well, as long as I was telling people I wanted to be a writer. Notebooks are easy gifts: they can be beautiful, they can be practical, and it's an easy writing accessory that everyone understands. 

As someone who has kept a journal my entire life, these notebook gifts have been a blessing, honestly. I've rarely had to buy my own journals, especially if someone goes above-and-beyond and gives me a Moleskine for Christmas. However, it also has meant that I've always had a surplus of notebooks. 

In fact, this surplus started to get really embarrassing when I was pregnant. I unearthed a box of blank notebooks while getting organized and cleaning out Forrest's room. I had a stack of empty notebooks on my desk, on the bookshelf in my office, in a drawer under my desk... I had notebooks. I had notebooks upon notebooks. I had more notebooks than I would ever use in my life. Why? Because I cannot hand write fiction, or poetry, or anything. The only thing I use notebooks for is journaling. And a girl can only journal so much. 

It was time to bite the bullet. I always wanted to be the kind of person who could quietly sit with a notebook and write a story. At least get out the bare bones of it. I like journaling by hand and I like taking notes; I like writing out my grocery lists and to do lists. But trying to describe something, to actually write, by hand is a huge challenge for me. I know myself well enough now to know that it's just never going to happen. That's fine! 

So I had to get rid of all those notebooks. 

Some of them were beautiful, and expensive. Some of them I had bought myself, sure that the "right notebook" would spur my creativity. Some were cheap ones I'd bought in the last days of School Supply sales. Some were gifts. Some were party favors, or I received free from work. 

They all went. Into a box, that went to Goodwill, that hopefully sold them to someone who needed them, who can actually write in a notebook. It felt weird to let go of them, to let go of the idea of the kind of person I thought I could try to be. 

5 Easy Non-Food Items for Easter Baskets

Easter is one of those holidays that is just very easy to love, but loving it can feel a bit... odd. Especially if you, like me, are not Catholic. I just really enjoy Easter baskets: my mom always went all out for our Easter baskets. I distinctly remember a few Pokemon themed baskets one year! 

I wanted to share a few ideas for easy, non-food items for your Easter Baskets--whether it's for your kids, your husband, your friends, whoever. I try to avoid giving candy as a gift because, to me, it's just a temptation! Here are a few ideas. 

1. Books

One of my favorite gifts to get Forrest is books! We picked out the book Thumper's Furry Friends together, and he has another surprise book for Easter morning. To me, there is nothing like a new book. One year, Danny got me A Wrinkle In Time for Easter. It was one of the best gifts I've ever received! This book is on my list for Easter this year.

2. Lip balm

Right now, I'm loving Vaseline Lip Therapy with Aloe. They have a limited edition Easter tin available at Target through Easter and it is so cute! However, the best part is that with the purchase of any Vaseline product, they provide skincare products to those in need. That's a win-win! 

3. Wet'n'Wild Liquid Catsuit

If you haven't tried this liquid lipstick yet, drop everything and get to a drug store! If you have a friend, a daughter, or a mom who loves to rock a strong, matte lip, Liquid Catsuit is puuuurrfect. (I'm sorry, that was a terrible pun.) It comes in a ton of colors. I personally own Rebel Rose and Berry Recognize. Both last all day without a single reapplication. Yes, even through eating and drinking, talking, touching my mouth, working out... For $4.99 a piece, they're the best gift. (Oh and Wal-Greens is having a buy one, get one deal, so you can snag one for yourself too!) 

4. Gift cards

Ok, I swear I put this on every list I make, but gift cards are the best gifts. Period, end of story. Whether they're for the grocery store or your favorite restaurant, they are endlessly adaptable to the person. My favorites are Starbucks gift cards (I can send them straight from my phone!) and Amazon gift cards (because Kindle books). 

5. A make up themed basket

I've been lusting after so many blush, highlight, eyeshadow, and contour palettes lately! There are so many cool affordable ones right now. If you have a friend who loves make up, it's really the way to go. I love this palette from Makeup Revolution and for only $18 (and available at Ulta), it's amazing. Throw in a few brushes, some face masks from Target, a pack of fancy make up wipes, and some lip balm and it's a make up lovers dream! 

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Disclaimer: I received samples of the Vaseline Lip Therapy with Aloe in exchange for a post featuring them. However, all praise of said product is my own--it's a great lip balm! For information about my disclosure policy, click here. 

A Little Reading Nook Inspiration

If you follow me on any social media, you know that on Friday, I was hit by the flu. Well, both Forrest and I were hit by the flu. Having a toddler get so sick is bad enough. But trying to take care of him while simultaneously being taken down by a 103 degree fever is even worse. Nothing anyone can say will fully prepare you for the moment you just can't get off the couch to stop your toddler from throwing every book over the baby gate. But it happens. We've made it through the worst of it. All Forrest has left is a small cough; he's finally eating again (thank goodness!). 

I, on the other hand, can't sleep at night I cough so much and my throat hurts so bad. I have absolutely no voice (try ordering a tea at Starbucks with no voice, it's fun for everyone!). But we're making it through. 

One thing that fell by the wayside over the weekend was, obviously, my blog. I thought and thought about what I should try to post and one thing that came to mind was... reading nooks. 

I've been reading a lot since I got sick. When I wake up in the middle of the night and slather myself with Vick's VapoRub, I often read for an hour until I get sleep again. Looking at reading nooks on Pinterest is also a great way to pass those wee morning hours until everyone else wakes up. 

So here's a little fun reading nook inspiration. Just because it's fun to imagine. 

I definitely have a preferred "look" when it comes to reading nooks. This one (source) is pretty much perfect. The natural wood, tons of books, a bed. I could sleep there. Forever. It's very "cupboard under the stairs" in terms of size, but looks way cozier than Harry Potter's former bedroom. 

That being said, I'm really into these two opposing nooks: you can roll from your computer nook to your reading nook. The window seat reading nook is super popular and you can find tons of options for it on Pinterest. To tour the entire house that features these nooks, click here. 

Let's get back to my aesthetic, however. If I had to have the flu anywhere, I'd prefer to have it here. Because it's just... better than anywhere else. A big comfy bed and a bunch of books (plus maybe some DayQuil and a few boxes of tissues and someone to bring me tea) would be much better than chasing a toddler and falling asleep on the couch while he watches BabyFirst TV. You can check out an entire Buzzfeed article of these beauties here. 

I had to include one more just for practicality. When it comes to reading nooks, ones that also act as bookshelves are genius. I love this style and could for sure see myself sleeping there for several days in a row. I couldn't find an original source for this, but you can view the Pin from Pinterest here. 

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Did you enjoy this little reading nook relaxation post? If so, I'd love it if you'd sign up for the Writing Between Pauses newsletter! You can do so by clicking here. 

What is Hygge? + Inspiration

It seems like, out of no where, this thing called hygge started showing up on social media. From Twitter to Instagram to Pinterest, social media decor seems to be dominated by #hygge (hashtag-hygge, as I often say to my husband). I can't deny the allure of what appears to be a focus on warm, cozy spaces. So I thought I'd share a few bits of inspiration for hygge--as well as talking about what hygge is, practically. 

So, what is hygge? 

Photo credit

According to KhachiLife, hygge is:

"hard to pronounce and directly translate (try saying ‘hoo-gah,’ then Denmark-ify it). It’s also hard to describe, mainly because it’s more so a state of mind and heart and less an actual thing or action. The two closest English words that offer a good start to understanding this positive attitude are ‘warm’ and ‘cozy’."

So, that makes it... easier? 

In general, on Pinterest, it seems to center around being cozy, using lots of throw blankets, and make sure your living space is warm, inviting, and relaxing. In general, decor has recently been what I consider rather cold (the all-white walls, the stiff, retro couches, the uncomfortable dining room chairs that look pretty); hygge is totally opposite. I would say my mother's living room growing up was "hygge": it was safe, it was warm, it was perfect. Even if it wasn't in Martha Stewart Living. 

Want a little hygge inspiration? 

Here are a few lovely resources I've gathered up. 

My friend, Sian, at Rebel Angel has a great post on hygge. She covers some elements of hygge that are easy to include in your own home. 

25 Ways to Fill Your Life with Hygge. I love this list of 25 ways to add a little hygge to your home (without going totally overboard on one design concept). Most importantly, this list invites you to make hygge your own. 

A free hygge printable, from Design by Claire. I love this pretty little printable. I actually printed it out myself and put it up in my bathroom (which is teal and embroidery themed, in general!). It fits perfectly. 

12 Ways to Create the Danish Hygge Look at Home. Again, great suggestions to adding a little hygge to your life. Of course, the photography is top notch. If only my own hygge home looked that pretty all the time... I notice none of these decor blogs feature toddler-destroyed living rooms as hygge! 

From Oprah (the queen of comfy & loving bread), a few ways to embrace hygge. I do enjoy the reference to calling candles "living lights." Very hygge. 

If you want even more hygge inspiration, be sure to follow my #hygge board on Pinterest. 

My February Goals

Tell me I'm not alone: it felt like January went on forever, right? Every week, I thought, next week has to be the last week of January. We're still not done yet! Longest. Month. Ever. This is the January Slump in full effect. 

Since January is almost over, I wanted to share my February goals with you. As you probably remember, when it comes to setting goals, I made myself promise to set baby step goals: I can't do everything at once. 

How did January go? Mid-way through January, I decided to reassess my "health" goals. I reset my FitBit goal to be 6,000 steps instead of 10,000. Why? Because I wasn't getting anywhere close to 10,000 steps a day, it made me depressed, and it made it harder to get motivated. As time passes, I'll increase my step goal accordingly. 

My other goals (like letting myself relax and working on blog promotion) went really well. I set up G Suite for my blog (uh, three years after the fact?) so now you can email me at michelle@writingbetweenpauses.com. Fancy, right? I'm also 8% completed with my Goodreads 2017 goal. So that's exciting! I've also written over 30,000 words in January, not including work and blog posts. That's huge! 

OK, enough checking in! Here are my goals for February. 

1. Promote more bloggers on social media. I want to start sharing 3-4 articles by other bloggers on Twitter. Why? It's kind! It helps them! I love the blogging community and contributing to a positive atmosphere is more important than anything else. 
2. Start taking 1 day off a month to deep clean my house. In December, I took a week off to clean my house and it was amazing. I realized yesterday that I would feel a lot better if I took the time, without Forrest following me around, to deep clean my house one day a month. 
3. Continue going walking in the afternoons. Speaking of FitBit step goals, for the past week, I've taken Forrest walking every afternoon, if the weather permitted. Or we walked up and down the driveway with him in the Ergo. This helped me meet my reduced step count goal every single day. I want to keep it up because I feel better about myself when I hit this goal and can take Forrest somewhere fun. 

What are your goals for February?